Man Says First Dates Keep Ending Awkwardly When Women Don’t Initiate Goodbye Hugs, Internet Offers Clarification

A post shared to r/datingadviceformen on Oct. 7, 2026, asks about women's reactions at the end of first dates. The poster wrote that unless he initiates a goodbye hug, the dates often end awkwardly. The post had received more than 24 upvotes and 141 comments at the time of publication.

The Redditor asked why first dates that seem to go well end with an awkward goodbye. “I can go on a first date make her laugh and seemingly flirt and it’s like she had a good time,” he wrote.

His dates usually begin with a hug, but he said he has to initiate one at the end. “When the date ends the girls just awkwardly stand there,” he added. “They never initiate and it’s like they don’t want to hug. One of them even reached out for a handshake.”

He asked in the thread what the behavior means and whether it indicates a lack of romantic attraction. “Is that not enough evidence they’re enjoying or is there something deeper I must look for,” the poster wrote.

“Not every woman will make it obvious and it’s a guessing game,” he added. The poster also considered texting after a date. “Perhaps it’s better to ask and text after the date I’m attracted to you do you feel the same way?”

The Redditor also asked whether getting a kiss after asking would increase a woman's interest in a second date and whether the approach should happen naturally or be forced in the moment. He wrote that he went on another date on Oct. 7, 2026, and touched the woman's arm and squeezed it. The date also included a hello hug and a goodbye hug.

One reply suggested that reluctance to hug at the end of a date could indicate disinterest. “If they’re hugging you at the start, but reluctant to hug at the end, and you’re not getting a second date with them,” one commenter wrote, “then they’ve likely lost attraction to you during the date.”

Another commenter asked the poster to consider the other person's perspective. “Ah so because they do those things, that MUST mean they a) were lying the whole time?” another reply wrote. “b) HAVE to be ok with a hug?”

“Put yourself in their shoes, is this fair?” they asked. “One of the biggest mistakes men make about dating, especially these days, is assuming there’s some kind of meta. One of the others is rationalising certain things according to their stung pride.”

One commenter advised the poster to ask his date instead of speculating about hidden meanings. “The best thing you can do is ask,” one other commenter wrote. “Most men live in these asinine theories and lose energy agonising over it.”

The Daily Dot was unable to independently verify the experiences described in this post. The details above reflect the poster’s account as shared on Reddit. The poster’s and commenters’ identities have not been confirmed.