TikTok content creator @thequinbeeshow shared a video explaining why she believes it’s an immediate red flag when a man repeatedly brings up his ex-girlfriend while dating someone new. The video generated close to 178,000 views and 269 comments, with Quin arguing that mentioning an ex can be a sign that a man is still emotionally attached to her. If you’re the new woman in his life, she says, you shouldn’t waste your time.
Quin began the video by warning women that if a man brings up his ex while dating them, mentions her by name, describes her appearance in detail, or even mentions her social media handles, these could be telltale signs that he’s not over her.
She went on to explain three reasons why she believes this matters. The first is that the ex wouldn’t be present in his thoughts to begin with if she weren’t still relevant to him. Basically, if she didn’t matter to him, Quin argues, he wouldn’t bother mentioning her.
The second reason Quin says a man might bring up his ex is because it’s an ego move. She explained that a man may mention his ex as a subtle flex to show his new partner the caliber of women he’s used to attracting. She said this can happen especially if the ex is conventionally attractive, has a successful business or career, or has a high social status.
On the other hand, Quin explained that if his ex doesn’t fit those standards, he may mention her to get his new partner to compare herself to her. If he describes the ex in a way that makes the new woman feel like she’s his “upgrade,” Quin says he’s creating a comparison trap.
However, whether the new woman is positioned as the upgrade or not, Quin argues that the fact that he’s bringing up his ex means she’s still relevant to him in some way.
TikToker Explains Why Men Bring Up Their Exes While Dating Someone New
Quin said another major sign that a man may not be completely over his ex is if he mentions that she blocked him, regardless of the reason.
She explained that if a past relationship ended on good terms, then, in her view, there would be no reason for an ex to block him. She said, “A woman does not block a man that she's at peace with.”
She went on to suggest that, more than likely, he was stalking his ex’s social media pages or still trying to contact her in some way.
Quin also argued that a man who is truly healed doesn’t bash his ex or speak poorly about her. Most importantly, she said a healed man doesn’t need to prove his value through the women from his past.
Finally, she made it clear that if a man is still talking about his ex, she believes he hasn’t fully made space for the new woman in his life. According to Quin, it could be a sign that he’s still affected by the past relationship or continues to think about his ex.
Reactions to the video came mostly from women in the comments section who agreed with her assessment, with many experiencing the same thing with their current partner. One commenter said her partner kept mentioning how much he hated his ex. She said, "Yeah, definitely true. This guy kept telling me how he hates her so much and kept talking about her. I left and blocked him, Go back to your ex boo boo."
Another commenter said her partner brought up his ex without her asking. She wrote, "He mentioned his ex two times today and I didn't even ask."
Another commenter said her partner shared intimate details about his ex. She wrote, "He talked about her so much that at one point I felt like I was dating her instead. . . I knew everything about her from childhood to family drama to intimate stuff. . . He told me everything including her mom's birthday!"
The Daily Dot was unable to independently verify the claims made by TikTok creator @thequinbeeshow, which are based solely on the account shared in her video.
