A TikToker who goes by @thebutanfam sparked a debate among parents after sharing how she is raising her kids to work hard for what they want. In the video, the mother explained that she requires her children to read for two hours each day during summer vacation and practice their sports for the same amount of time.
Some TikTokers criticized the approach, arguing that the strict schedule could put too much pressure on children and encourage perfectionism instead of allowing them to enjoy a normal childhood. The video had garnered 459,700 likes and 19,300 comments at the time of writing.
@thebutanfam I’m raising my children to be GREAT. Sorry, not sorry, that some of y’all can’t relate. ??♀️ #motherhood #greatness #Fatherhood #ILoveMyKids
♬ original sound - The Butan Fam
The mother also shared photos of her children making memories, including traveling around the world and going on Disney cruises. While she emphasized the importance of hard work, she appeared to show that her children also have opportunities to have fun and enjoy their childhood.
She also highlighted some of their accomplishments. According to the mother, her children have won awards at school and in sports as a result of the work they put in.
Not all parents agreed with her approach, but many supported her in the comments.
Parents Are Divided Over Her Parenting Approach
The debate quickly moved beyond the amount of time the children spend reading and practicing sports, with commenters sharing their own experiences growing up with similarly structured routines.
Many said those expectations helped them develop discipline and succeed later in life, while others continued to question whether children should have that much structure during their summer break.
Someone shared their experience with the same rules, “As someone who was ‘forced’ to read for 2 hours and play a sport and a musical instrument - all four of my siblings were D1 athletes, hold six figure careers, and have wonderful partners. We’re all grateful to my parents.” Another added, “Sounds like my childhood. About to graduate law school in a few months from a top school. I have my own place, no kids, dog, luxury vehicle, travel whenever I want, buy whatever I want.”
Someone else responded, “The problem is that you are a PARENT and people don’t understand that level of responsibility. Your kids are blessed to have you.”
Others noted that there is a literacy crisis, and this mother encouraging her children to read is a good thing. Even teachers in the comments agreed. “As a teacher…tell those people to kick rocks!”
Someone else noted that people who complain about how she’s raising her children may be the same ones who let their kids spend hours on an iPad to keep them from annoying them.
“iPad kids are the ones being abused and neglected, I hope I’m close to the mother you are when I have my own.”
Raising kids isn’t a one size fits all experience. Some people thought the way this TikToker was raising her kids was perfect, while others thought they were missing out on their childhoods.
The Daily Dot was unable to independently verify the details of @thebutanfam’s parenting routine, which are based on the account she shared in her TikTok video.
