A TikTok Mom, @miabkuykendall, posted a video which received close to 126,000 views and a total of 270 comments, describing the reason she changed the age gaps between her kids that she originally wanted after her firstborn. Initially, she said she wanted a larger gap to be able to enjoy each infancy stage individually, but after experiencing what came with her first child, she's having other thoughts.
Mia began the video by explaining that she originally wanted a four- to five-year age gap but has since decided that she would prefer to have her children about two years apart. Her firstborn is around 16 months old, and she says she's already experiencing baby fever again.
Mia explained that her original preference was largely about having enough time to enjoy each stage of her children's development without feeling overwhelmed by having to divide her attention between two young children.
However, her experience with her first son made her rethink that plan.
One commenter agreed with the idea of having children closer in age, saying it could mean getting through the more demanding early years together. "Girl, yes, get the hard years over TOGETHER then when they are older and close in age it will be a dream!! Mine are 17 months apart!" the commenter wrote.
Breastfeeding and postpartum depression made Mia reconsider the age gap
Mia said her first son experienced colic during the first few months of his life, and she also faced challenges while breastfeeding him for 15 months. She added that she began experiencing postpartum depression when he was around a year old.
"When he was about a year old, I started really going through it mentally, and . . . I felt like I was fighting every day to, like, stay happy and optimistic," she said.
Mia explained that she eventually realized she had been feeling this way during the breastfeeding period. After she stopped breastfeeding, she began to feel like herself again.
Because of that experience, Mia said she worries about finally reaching a point where motherhood feels more manageable, only to go through the challenges of postpartum recovery and breastfeeding again several years later. Having children closer together, she suggested, could allow her to navigate those demanding stages within a shorter period of time, while the experience is still fresh in her mind.
Mia also said that having another child closer in age to her firstborn could give him a sibling to play with. She explained that she and her partner don't live near family and are often busy with their own responsibilities. She hopes a smaller age gap could mean her son has a built-in playmate as they grow up.
Reactions to the post came largely from mothers who agree with the two-year age gap method. One commenter said she had her daughters two years apart, and their bond has grown strong. She wrote, "My girls are exactly two years apart and yes it's challenging but it's so nice having them close. My girls are three and one now and they love each other so much!"
Another commenter agreed with her strategy. She wrote, "Yes! I don't want to wait too long to need to survive again! I feel like getting to enjoy their first year, then adding another baby isn't a bad idea."
The Daily Dot was unable to independently verify the personal experiences shared by TikTok creator @miabkuykendall, which are based solely on her account in the video.
