A Man’s Mother Keeps Asking for Money to Send to Relatives Before a Major Festival

A poster on r/entitledparents wrote that he pays for his parents' apartment and credit card, and that his mother wanted more money for relatives. The post had 73 upvotes and 16 comments at the time.

The Redditor said he was married and said he pays a home loan EMI on his parents' apartment. His parents are also doing interior work there before moving in. "I'm having to help out there as well," he wrote.

He said he had been making a monthly payment to his father. The poster wrote that the father's retirement savings were used for his marriage. "They had to take out money from his retirement savings for my marriage," he wrote. "I have also been paying the maintenance charges of this new apartment."

He also said he pays his mother's credit card bills. "Apart from the above, I have to pay the monthly bills of my mom's credit card," the poster wrote. His mother asked him to "send money to random relatives just so that she can maintain her image in from of them."

One commenter said the arrangement was reasonable to a point. "Helping your folks out after they helped with your wedding seems reasonable," they wrote. "And it's not unusual in some parts of the world to have an expectation of helping parents."

The commenter said the poster could refuse requests involving relatives. "I think it's ok to draw the line at 'random relatives,'" they wrote. "Just say NO."

A second commenter suggested a response if the mother tried to guilt him. "I heard someone recently say 'no' is a complete sentence," they wrote. "If she guilts you about it you can always say you dont have it unless you take from the money you set aside for her for the next months round of bills. She probably wouldnt want to spend whats meant for her on someone else.[sic]"

A third commenter advised the poster to set boundaries. "It sounds like your mom is financially abusing you," they wrote. "It's hard to set boundaries with your parents, but this cycle won't end if you don't set clear boundaries."

They wrote that the poster's own life needed funding too. "You have your own life to live, to pay for, and maintain," they wrote. "I would recommend you have a talk with your parents to discuss the financial situation and be honest with them."

The Daily Dot was unable to independently verify the poster's finances, family arrangements, or the requests described in the Reddit post and comments. The details above reflect the post and comments on r/entitledparents.