A TikTok video from creator @emaltalks, which had drawn more than 1.8 million views and over 14,000 comments as of publication, shows him doing a short reflection on how children raised by angry parents often end up repeating that same behavior as adults.
Walking down a street while filming himself, the creator looked into the camera while recalling a statement he had heard from someone earlier.
"Someone said that when you grow up in a household with angry parents, when you reach adulthood and you look for a person that you want to marry, you look for a kind person. But now that person who's angry is you," he said.
The creator did not elaborate on personal experience, offer additional advice, or identify the person who made the original statement.
Reacting to the video, many commenters described recognizing the exact pattern in their own lives. One commenter described the moment of realization as painful. They wrote, "this is so true and it hurts when you realise [sic] you became the person you tried so hard not to be."
Another commenter phrased the same idea more bluntly. They wrote, "you always grew up saying you won't be like them until you did..."
A separate commenter described actively working to change the behavior after a partner pointed it out to them. They wrote, "I had to learn to lower my voice. I was naturally just loud until i was told by my partner. Marrying a kind person makes u a better person. Overtime u unlearn the toxic stuff from childhood" [sic].
Another commenter said the realization had led them to avoid marriage altogether, citing concern for a future partner. They wrote, "this is why i could never marry. and never want to really. bcs i am now the angry person. and no kind person deserves to experience this anger."
One user shared what their therapist had advised them during their process of self healing, "Мy therарist ѕuggеstеd that mаybe my brаin is not uѕеd tо feеling easе, peaсe and ѕtillness, so it’s purроsefullу diving into disсomfоrt, іt’s a раradоx bc І felt more comfortable іn dіscоmfоrt and rush of thoughtѕ, cause that fеlt fаmilіаr. Тold mе to rеad Нealіng Iѕn’t Prеttу bу Mіra Hаrtѕon and іt сhаnged my rеalіty, big rеcоmmendаtion."
The Daily Dot was unable to independently verify the personal experiences described by commenters on this video. The details reflect the video shared by @emaltalks on TikTok and the personal accounts shared by commenters. The creator attributed the observation to an unidentified third party rather than presenting it as his own insight.
