Dating might be more convenient than ever—apps, DMs, and algorithms make it easy to meet someone new.
But actually finding a real connection? That part still feels difficult for a lot of people.
And while there are no shortages of self-proclaimed dating experts online, not all of them are as well-intentioned as they claim to be.
Recently, TikTok creator Rachel Cuello (@rachelcuello) shared a video that has now garnered more than 681,600 views, where she reflects on her experience dating a man who works as a dating coach.
According to Cuello, he wasn’t using his knowledge to help people build healthier relationships—he was using it to manipulate the women he dated.
A similar story confirmed her suspicions
“A girl reached out to me saying she had a very similar experience with the same exact man, the same dating coach,” Cuello said in the video. “Her and I are going to get drinks together next weekend. Can’t wait.”
Cuelllo says their stories are “eerily similar.” The man allegedly started dating the other woman the day after things ended between him and Rachel—and allegedly followed the same pattern with both of them.
“There’s a 10-year age gap between her and him,” she says. “There’s a 9-year age gap between me and him.”
After comparing notes, Cuello says it confirmed what she already suspected.
“He talks to women all day every day about dating,” she explains. “He’s gotten so into the female brain, our thoughts, our emotions, what we fundamentally want and need in a man… so when he sees a beautiful woman that he wants, he knows exactly what to do to manipulate her.”
What bothers her most is how he presents himself online.
“He comes on TikTok talking about dating with purpose, dating with intention, how to communicate,” Cuello claims. “Acting like he’s the [expletive].”
“Let’s not underplay this. He is insane. He is a narcissist,” she says in conclusion.
The rise of dating coaches online
In the last few years, dating coaches have taken over TikTok.
Some offer thoughtful advice, while others go viral for their controversial takes. But here’s the thing: The industry is totally unregulated. Anyone can call themselves a dating coach—no training or license required.
That’s part of why people are getting skeptical.
On Reddit, one user summed it up by writing, “These coaches seem to promise that their system will work and prey on people's hopes. It just feels so exploitive to me, and that therapy would be a better use of money.”
Others were less kind. “They are a scam,” another user wrote. “They prey on the weak and teach them to take advantage of vulnerable women.”
According to Psyche, there were more than 53,000 life coaches worldwide as of 2018. That number hasn’t been updated recently, but it’s very possible it has only gone up since—especially since more people are now turning to the internet for emotional guidance.
Given how unregulated the niche is, it’s not all that surprising that someone coaching others on relationships might turn out to be pretty bad at them—and maybe even a problem for the partners they date.
Commenters speculate
In the comments, users speculated about who this dating coach might be. However, it’s important to note that Cuello has not revealed the name of the man she’s talking about.
Others questioned why someone like this would even be considered dateable in the first place.
“Why are we even considering dating ‘dating coaches’ in the first place?” one person wrote. “That job title should be an automatic no. Same with life coaches and whatever pseudo internet gurus are out there.”
Others said the man’s alleged behavior sounded all too familiar.
“Narcissists always do the same things with new supply,” one viewer said. “It’s like a checklist.”
The Daily Dot has reached out to Cuello via TikTok and Instagram messages for comment.
