Starbucks just hired the Chipotle CEO, and people are joking about how small future portion sizes will be

There’s been a shakeup at everyone’s favorite readily available public bathroom (I’m told they also serve coffee).

After a year on the job, Laxman Narasimhan is stepping down from his position of Starbucks CEO. The change comes after a year in which Starbucks sales dropped 3% globally at stores that had been open for at least a year, including a 2% drop in all North American stores. High prices and changing market demands are cited as the primary reason for this, but the Starbucks powers that be just didn’t think Narasimhan was up to the task of righting the ship and getting profits back on track. 

So, who’s the man for the job? What titan of industry did they bring in to make all right in the frappe and day-old breakfast sandwich world? 

Who did Starbucks hire as their new CEO?

Why, that would be Chipotle CEO Brian Niccol.

Remember Brian Niccol? He’s the guy who insisted Chipotle’s serving sizes weren’t getting smaller yet more expensive despite the fact that they most definitely are. The one who suggested you 'give a look' to get more portions.

That’s the guy hired to right the good ship Starry Bucks. Oh good. 

Social media reacts to the news

But the Internet has a long memory, so this news was not going to idly pass without some sort of (dark) roasting. And people, the portions of shade are anything but smallt.

Let’s take a look at some of the best social media jokes made about Niccol’s appointment.  

Well done, all. Toast yourselves with a thimble of Guatemala Antigua!

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