Unanimous NBA MVP Steph Curry has been pretty lackluster in the finals. Given the Golden State Warriors‘ unwavering dominance and record-setting season, it’s a bit surprising to see him sputter and falter in this critical match-up.
Turns out some seriously shitty footwear may be to blame—the kind of shoes that make you want to drill out all your tennis balls and start stockpiling walkers or learn how to install a new garage door opener.
Meet the newly unveiled Under Armour Curry 2 Low “Chef” kicks. They’re hideous.
Serving game since ’88.
— Under Armour Basketball (@UAbasketball) June 8, 2016
Get cooking with the #CurryTwo ‘Chef’ now: https://t.co/WacMKttM4e pic.twitter.com/ZAWm6fpnWN
Shoe enthusiasts over at Sneakernews have rated the bland chefs a paltry 2.6 out of 5. And Twitter has had a field day roasting these kicks to a crisp.
https://twitter.com/THEKIDMERO/status/741072326704402433
https://twitter.com/HumbleTeej/status/741060984874242049
“You forgot to collect last night’s homework.” pic.twitter.com/lcW5xv6mKM
— brandon / jinx / big jinx (@brandonjinx) June 9, 2016
https://twitter.com/aarontor/status/741289810975920128
https://twitter.com/KingFavre/status/741329893712105477
Dad jokes are plentiful, given a father’s desire for comfort, zero style, and the utmost embarrassment of their child.
@netw3rk pic.twitter.com/BDFyw3D6H6
— Ben Detrick (@bdetrick) June 9, 2016
https://twitter.com/theshrillest/status/741083332306313216
“How Do I Get Songs off My Zune” 5s pic.twitter.com/xtpOSpmG0A
— Fastbreak Breakfast (@fastbreakbreak) June 10, 2016
I tweet for washed men who laugh @ the chef lows but would get em on clearance & wear em to their son’s tball game pic.twitter.com/lanFhWJSTH
— Mr. CRDLL (@crossnola) June 10, 2016
Perhaps Under Armour is eying that sweet Father’s Day cash. Maybe Curry is just that unfashionable. Riley is probably already having nightmares about these lows, begging her mom to make their $3.2 million house a shoeless palace.
For the love of your child, your fans, and the game, please take off the early bird specials, Curry. At least until the finals are over.