The stalwart lexicographers at Dictionary.com on Thursday announced that four out of five adults claim to be good spellers. To which we can only say: “LOL, your crazy.”
The idea that 80 percent of the Internet would survive the first round in a third-grade spelling bee has to rank among the most ludicrous fantasies ever concocted by humankind. We imagine that Harris Poll, which conducted the survey for Dictionary.com, would have drawn different conclusions if they had waded into the world of words as they’re actually spelled on Twitter. Behold, and weep.
https://twitter.com/NeeeeNeeee9/status/633105689393532929
https://twitter.com/SnoowHoee/status/627552519372156928
Never take anything for granite cause you won’t even realize it until it’s too late, so be kind and loving to your family and friends always
— Meghan Flaugh (@megflaugh) August 17, 2015
https://twitter.com/dearangelhs/status/594181542546644992
All these pet of files are gonna burn in hell.
— maddie (@MaddieeClairee) August 20, 2015
We don’t need any more illegal immigrint migrant workers here,we already have enough cherry pickers in the Obama Admin & DC #KellyFile
— ❌The Real Mean Mr Mustard❌ (@GalaxySojourn) August 6, 2015
https://twitter.com/abby_sanches/status/634211940592668673
@Malri79 just because you don’t like the truth doesn’t mean that people who read it are not educated..that’s showing your ignorants
— rosepetal (@rosepetal777777) July 30, 2015
My teacher is planning to buy us wine and make whoredurves for the end of the semester.
— kimbei (@KimiSmall) April 10, 2013
As for your high school friends on Facebook…it’s probably best not to look.
Photo via Susanne Nilsson/Flickr (CC BY-SA 2.0)