Five days into the melee of South By Southwest, at the Tuesday bridge of the Interactive conference and Music festival, the strains are starting to show on the weary and brave attendees attempting to push through the entire 10-day festival. Austin locals and SXSW veterans have their ways of coping, though, especially by laying on the snark.
If you’ve been through SXSW enough times, you begin to embrace the chaos and recognize its patterns of crazy secret shows, celebrities doing ridiculous stunts, and hipsters of all varieties. It’s hard not make fun of the pure extravagance.
Thankfully, some excellent Twitter parody accounts have emerged over the past few years that help us laugh through the week, and maybe restore a little sanity. We recommend sitting back with a nice Deep Eddy vodka cocktail and simply taking in the extraordinary scene unfolding around you.
Share your finds from this year on Twitter, Instagram, and Vine using the hashtags #SXSWin and #SXSWFail. We’ll be posting our favorite selections at sxswinsandfails.tumblr.com.
1) @SXSWPartyzzzzz
SXSWPartyzzzzz has provided an excellent run up in preparation to SXSW, picking up where it left off last year the with hilarious scenarios that sound just ridiculous enough to maybe be true. Run by Dan Treadway, a contributor for the Onion and Sports Illustrated, Partyzzzzz takes on all aspects of the fest, from interactive and film to music and this year’s new sports event, rolling it into a massive ball of hype and rumor.
Jason Derulo will be singing his interpretation of names written on coffee cups at the Starbucks Ordering Party on Cesar Chavez! RT to RSVP!
— SXSW Partyzzzzz (@SXSWPartyzzzzz) March 10, 2014
Lauren Conrad and Gary Shandling are headlining Exxon’s slam poetry competition! RSVP by angrily screaming “I’M BUILDING A BRAND HERE!”
— SXSW Partyzzzzz (@SXSWPartyzzzzz) March 9, 2014
Sir Patrick Stewart’s karaoke duckboat departs in 9 seconds! RSVP by violently shaking a stranger while shouting “ARE YOU THE YELLOW KING?!”
— SXSW Partyzzzzz (@SXSWPartyzzzzz) March 7, 2014
Comcast’s bar crawl will let attendees choose between Bud Light, Bud Light and Bud Light! RSVP by embracing the illusion of consumer choice!
— SXSW Partyzzzzz (@SXSWPartyzzzzz) March 6, 2014
Pitbull, Lorde and the control key on Skrillex’s laptop will be playing an intimate acoustic set in a pedicab circling Stubbs!! RT to RSVP!!
— SXSW Partyzzzzz (@SXSWPartyzzzzz) March 3, 2014
2) @SXSWhine
For those tired of hearing everyone complain about SXSW instead of just enjoying the range of possibilities, SXSWhine is the account for you.
Dedicated to Twitter-shaming those folks venting the #firstworldproblems of SXSW attendees, the account has been going for years and is run by local Zach Teibloom, who has a number of hilarious projects you can follow. Be careful what you vent about at SXSW, you just might find yourself RT’d into the stream of some the most ridiculous and tone-deaf complaints imaginable.
As SXSWhine says, “SXSW is awesome. You should enjoy it.”
The fact that Beiber of all people is out @sxsw in Austin right now, makes me really glad I didn’t go this year. #ugh #makeitstop
— Courtney Kelly (@ckelly82) March 10, 2014
So I can only get a wristband to see Kanye and Jay Z perform if I own a Samsung Galaxy?!? THIS. SUCKS. #iPhoneFail #sxsw #rage 😡
— Rachel Emma (@RachelEmmaTX) March 10, 2014
@SXSWhine big boi is too loud when you get this close pic.twitter.com/MgzeekzyFG
— ross (@codustyle) March 8, 2014
… And 1 reason #SXSW sucks: having to get in line at least 30 min before a session to get in.
— Danny Hsia (@mentaltofu) March 7, 2014
Yeah, that’s a weird SX only rule they have. RT @NextCornField: I hate how all the bars are 21+ for sxsw
— SXSWhine (@SXSWhine) March 6, 2014
3) @SXSWFanFiction
One of our favorite, lesser-known SXSW parody accounts, SXSWFanFiction offers of tweet style stories of stuff that probably is actually happening somewhere in downtown Austin this week. We’re not sure who is behind it, though it has been running since 2012, dishing a few gems over the course of the fest that range from snarky to prescient.
Alison brought her son to SX to encourage a career in tech. “I wanna do that!” said her son pointing at a pedi cabber dressed like a monkey.
— SXSW Fan Fiction (@SXSWFanFIction) March 7, 2014
Julie was in a meeting when the @thefader RSVP came up and it was closed when she got out. She didn’t see her friends at all during SXSW.
— SXSW Fan Fiction (@SXSWFanFIction) February 26, 2014
Artemis rarely goes out, but this is special. She says bye to her cats. Kate Nash begins her set. “Goddamnit! I thought it was Bush!” #sxsw
— SXSW Fan Fiction (@SXSWFanFIction) February 10, 2014
“The only apps I know are southwestern eggrolls!” Said Mike, as he high fived his friend Steve. The promo girl died inside a bit more.
— SXSW Fan Fiction (@SXSWFanFIction) March 9, 2013
4) @DrunkatSXSW
While we hope everyone enjoys SXSW responsibly, there is obviously a lot to work with for the DrunkatSXSW Twitter account.
Going back to 2010, DrunkatSXSW has been recording every stumble and slur, and enough snarky jabs at attendees to go around. They were on the scene for the interactive portion of the fest, but we hope they stick around for more of music this year.
OH: “This is like Burning Man for startups!” Millennial-speak for “this is my first SXSW and I don’t know what it’s all about.” #sxsw
— Drunk at SXSW (@drunkatsxsw) March 9, 2014
Getting our beards trimmed alongside tastemakers AND trendsetters. I don’t know what’s happening but it smells like innovation in here.
— Drunk at SXSW (@drunkatsxsw) March 9, 2014
Get your tickets now for Felix Baumgartner’s stunt tonight. He jumps the “Fake Shark brought to you by Pepsi™” in the river at 6pm.
— Drunk at SXSW (@drunkatsxsw) March 8, 2014
Heading over to the panel on “Skinny Jeans and their Affect on Our Monoculture”. See you there?
— Drunk at SXSW (@drunkatsxsw) March 8, 2014
5) @SXSWDouchebag and @AngryBartenderSXSW
Ah, the SXSW douchebag has become a perennial icon for the hipster influx that the fest brings, but we don’t want to forget his counterpart, the Angry SXSW bartender. Both these accounts are somewhat sporadic, but we hope that they return this year. Capturing great overheard moments throughout the week, the general experience of overeager attendees, and frustrated locals working the fest, you can likely see these two archetypes duke it out at any bar during SXSW.
“Yeah, I brought all my denim this week.” #sxsw #SXSW2013
— sxswDoucheBag (@sxswdouchebag) March 14, 2013
“Bulleit?! That’s the hipster Gatorade.” #SXSW #SXSWi
— sxswDoucheBag (@sxswdouchebag) March 9, 2013
I’m standing in front of a bar that is playing “Hip Hop Hooray”. #SXSW, on the cutting edge of music.
— Angry Bartender SXSW (@AngryBarSXSW) March 12, 2013
3 guys in banana costumes were blocking the sidewalk on my way to work & I already hate everyone. #sxsw #sxsw2013
— Angry Bartender SXSW (@AngryBarSXSW) March 9, 2013
#sxsw quote of the day “Oh my god Karen I think I sharted!” – girl who did not leave the party when she should have #sxsw #sxsw2013
— Angry Bartender SXSW (@AngryBarSXSW) March 10, 2013
Bonus Parody Account: SXSWDouchebags on Facebook
The SXSWDouchebags Facebook account, which seems separate from the Twitter handle, gets a special shout out because of its work in curating the ultimate meme from this year’s SXSW. He’s finally been found, the pinnacle of SXSW absurdity, rolling down the street on his segway, with Google Glass, and his iPhone in hand. The “Oblivious SXSW Tech Guy”: Amazing.
With over 150 pouring stations around town this week, Deep Eddy Vodka wants to show you some classic Austin hospitality this week. After all, good old-fashioned vodka always makes for a #SXSWin.
Photo via Imgur