Moby’s been having a rough week.
Not long after he posted a shirtless Instagram photo as evidence of having alleging dated Natalie Portman, the singer caught the wrath of the internet. Portman denied her relationship with Moby in a recent interview with Harper Bazaar UK Online, and stated her interactions with him were nothing more than an old man trying to be “creepy” with a young girl. Moby’s Instagram photo sought to prove that the two actually did meet, and they did go on a date, which means they must have been dating.
This is when the memes began.
People began posting photos of older actors standing next to young girls, with captions that mocked the way Moby wrote about his interaction with Portman.
https://twitter.com/ElliottKozuch/status/1131483629111132160
I recently read a gossip piece wherein Nicolas Cage said that we’d never dated. This confused me, as we did, in fact, date. And after briefly dating in 1999 we remained friends for years. I like Nicolas, and I respect his intelligence and activism. But, to be honest, I can’t figu pic.twitter.com/LiTsK6Jyi9
— Jill Gutowitz (@jillboard) May 22, 2019
Celebrities even jumped in, posting photos of themselves with other celebrities.
https://twitter.com/JohnRossBowie/status/1131223334354468864
I recently read a gossip piece wherein Regis Philbin said that we’d never dated. This confused me, as we did, in fact, date. And after briefly dating in 1999 we remained friends for years. I like Regis, and I respect his intelligence and activism. But, to be honest, I can’t figur pic.twitter.com/1kXoo7N5xC
— rob delaney (@robdelaney) May 22, 2019
Then other people posted photos (or photoshopped themselves) next to celebrities.
I recently read a gossip piece wherein Angelyne said that we’d never dated. This confused me , as we did, in fact date. To be honest, I can’t figure out why she would actively misrepresent the truth about our brief involvement. This is corroborating photo evidence. pic.twitter.com/djZuTUzzUL
— frank (@anti_frank) May 22, 2019
https://twitter.com/oliveswatz/status/1131577571609600000
I recently read a gossip piece wherein Papa John said that we’d never dated. This confused me, as we did, in fact, date. And after briefly dating in 1999 we remained friends for years. I like Papa John, and I respect his intelligence and activism. But, to be honest, I can’t figur pic.twitter.com/KXJruMd9ZO
— Tony Tortilla (@eriktruedson) May 22, 2019
And of course, what’s a meme without a Twin Peaks reference?
I recently read in a gossip piece where Laura Palmer said she was never Laura Palmer. This confused me as Laura Palmer was always Laura Palmer. And we remained friends without knowing what year it is. I like Laura Palmer and respect her inconceivable torment across all dimensions pic.twitter.com/edPDl7WDMO
— Eric Allen Hatch (@ericallenhatch) May 23, 2019
After all the internet backlash, Moby wrote on his Instagram: “Dear trolls, While I’m flattered by the attention, I just don’t know if the best use of your time and your life is hating a stranger based on egregiously limited information. I mean, when you are on your deathbed do you really want to think, “at least I spent my time hating strangers on social media”? It is of course your life, but I just have to assume there are better things to do with your time…but again, thank you for all of the attention, it’s very flattering.”
https://www.instagram.com/p/BxziMrVBljR/
He continued with another Instagram post, that included more photos of him with a young Natalie Portman, and a caption saying this incident has resulted in him receiving death threats from “strangers on the internet.”
https://www.instagram.com/p/Bxz_w3th-pU/
Shortly after, the singer gave one final sign off.
https://www.instagram.com/p/Bx0EKA9BDwS/
“Attack me, slander me, lie about me,” he wrote in another Instagram caption. “In the meantime I’ll be trying to save animals and help stop humans from destroying the only home we have. Bye.”
Maybe next week will be better, Moby.
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