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5 haiku inspired by KFC Japan’s new sexy chicken nugget mascot

She’s finger-lickin’ good.

Photo of Gabe Bergado

Gabe Bergado

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Forget the Hamburglar—there’s a new fast food mascot on the scene and ready to steal hearts. Meet KFC Japan’s new mascot: she has sparkly eyes, some of the plumpest lips around, and is busting out of her strapless red-and-white dress. She is also a chicken a nugget.

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Hot damn, right?

Cosmo reports that comedian Danny Choo posted a photo Kentucky Fried Chicken Japan’s new spokesthing earlier this week. Redditors have been busy discussing her beauty and the country’s obsession with the fried chicken franchise.

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And if you head on over to the KFC website, it looks like there are stickers/emojis of the chicken lady available through an app. She also strikes various poses for different menu items.

But to truly capture the poultry bombshell’s greasy beauty, we’ve whipped up some delicious haikus. Consider them an ode the enduring mystery that is the love between humans and anthropomorphized food:  

The spark in her eye,
Tender, soft bosom of meat.
She is my fried queen. 

kfc.co.jp

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Full of mystery,
No bone within her hot curves,
Please get in my mouth.

kfc.co.jp

Lips of a biscuit,
Booty like Nicki Minaj,
Taste of a nugget.

kfc.co.jp

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The Colonel wants her,
Her grace unattainable,
She is mine to dip. 

kfc.co.jp

Her skin so crispy,
Her body so damn juicy,
Finger-lickin’ good. 

kfc.co.jp

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H/T Cosmo | Photos via Danny Choo/Facebook, kfc.co.jp

 
The Daily Dot