The news that Apple’s new iPhone comes in two sizes—the iPhone 6 has a 4.7-inch screen, while the iPhone 6 Plus boasts 5.5 inches—triggered an avalanche of penis jokes this week.
WHY WE LETTING 5.5 INCHES WEAR THE NAME OF “6 PLUS”
— Jia Tolentino (@jiatolentino) September 9, 2014
As a gay man, I can assure you that an “iPhone 6 plus” is only 5.
— Jacob Bacharach (@jakebackpack) September 9, 2014
The new iPhone 6 is bigger than the average dick 😂
— carlyy (@Carrrsteww) September 10, 2014
But Twitter’s crudeness is no match for the sanitized sophomoric humor of your typical morning talk show, as Live With Kelly and Michael proved yesterday. This segment has it all: awkward sexual innuendo, faux-scandalized looks from Michael Strahan, and an audience that loves the idea of Kelly Ripa getting it on with a 10-inch iPad. Why settle for less?
Sorry, 5.5-inchers—Ripa’s got no time for anyone smaller than a Subway sandwich.
Photo by Sean MacEntee/Flickr (CC BY 2.0)
