From the nation that brought you “llamas running around a southwestern urban environment” comes: “Buffalo running around in upstate New York.”
Seems a dozen or so bison escaped from a farm in Schodack, N.Y., swam across the Hudson river and are now running free in the area. The animals have already broken through police lines twice, showing blatant disrespect for the law. Here is the poorly shot video to prove it:
Look at them go! Look at the newsmen and police follow! But are these bison just running free, or is there something far more sinister afoot? Let’s investigate:
Buffalo loose near Albany after escaping farm, swimming across Hudson http://t.co/4E3cksmTLq pic.twitter.com/xz0xRgdHCt
— Geoff Herbert (@deafgeoff) April 24, 2015
Hmmmm, this is fishy. How do the bison know to stay on the side of the road? My guess: these bison have been studying people for a long time, planning their escape meticulously (by the standards of bison escapes).
But why?
http://t.co/0BDnhJtxTv Cheering on the escaped herd of #buffalo near #Albany as they make their break for freedom heading West.
— taerse (@watchingYouTwit) April 24, 2015
Oh god, they live with crazy buffalo murderers. I mean, what the hell is going on in the Mesick house? Of course these bison are on the run! They’re refugees from a serial killer!
Also, we get it George, you love killing bison. That doesn’t mean you have room to mount two on the wall of your split-level. Also, if you’re so good at killing bison, WHY ARE THERE DOZENS OF BISON ROAMING THE ALBANY REGION, GEORGE? RIDDLE ME THAT, DR. BUFFLEKILL!
And, again: Where are they going?
They’re running towards the thruway! pic.twitter.com/v8XGowNziX
— Kimberly Howard (@KHow87) April 24, 2015
The New York State Thruway that connects Albany to… Buffalo? Oh no, you beautiful idiots! The city of Buffalo isn’t what you bison think it is! Run anywhere else. Literally anywhere else.
That said, guys, if you need a fellow beast to explain to you how to make the most of your stay in eastern New York, here’s Seahawks running back Marshawn Lynch on Buffalo’s nightlife:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h2uN28EJRlA
Update 1:30pm CT, April 24: Welp, things are getting out of hand:
https://twitter.com/patrickdodson/status/591654658071998465
https://twitter.com/patrickdodson/status/591658465803767809
But on the lighter side:
The #Bisons have the best record in the IL at 10-4. Apparently, more want to join our Herd! http://t.co/MBQBouQXXx pic.twitter.com/tCHRl9Qdvk
— Buffalo Bisons (@BuffaloBisons) April 24, 2015
Photo via Kabsik Park/Flickr (CC BY 2.0)