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Man asks if he’s the a**hole for criticizing his girlfriend who dresses like Ms. Frizzle

Who doesn’t like Ms. Frizzle?!

Photo of Siobhan Ball

Siobhan Ball

ms frizzle

A 43-year-old man showed a complete lack of self-awareness on the Am I the Asshole subreddit this week, assuming he’d done nothing wrong by lying to his preschool teacher girlfriend about other people finding her Ms. Frizzle-style wardrobe embarrassing.

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'AITA for not liking how my girlfriend dresses for work? https://bit.ly/38xnUOu' screenshot of the post
@AITA_reddit

Misleadingly titling his post “AITA for not liking how my girlfriend dresses for work?” OP went on to explain that his girlfriend usually wears matching dresses and masks to teach her class. She often makes the dresses herself she tends to coordinate them with whatever her students happen to be learning about that day, he said. He compared her outfits to Ms. Frizzle, the beloved teacher in The Magic School Bus book and TV series who takes her students on educational adventures.

Bro.... What? YTA Mrs. Frizzle is a treasure, she is not to be disrespected
KnightofNiApplicant
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I aspire to dress like Ms frizzle! It is my goal in life! (I am a teacher I do work with kids I love it and I wear funky shoes and my boyfriend loves them so much he bought me a pair( Yta op the big giant ass.
KnightofNiApplicant
Hell, I want to hire her as my personal dressmaker. I don’t work with kids anymore, but I do work from home so the dress code is pretty flexible. I want fun-patterned dresses and matching face masks! People like OP just suck all the joy out of life. It’s like the guy who was upset that his girlfriend loves Disney movies. People can enjoy things, good lord. Life doesn’t have to be boring just because you passed the age of 18.
boudicas_shield

The first problem comes from the fact that, despite the reason being blindingly obvious to anyone with half a brain, OP “just can’t explain” why his girlfriend dresses in fun, educational clothes to teach young children.

YTA. You...don't understand why a preschool teacher would dress in bright, fun, educational outfits? This can't be for real, can it?
mm172
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“I started dating a preschool teacher and for some reason she behaves in a manner appropriate to her profession??” Like sorry bro, dating an educator, you’re going to be dealing with fun dresses, silly sweaters, and funky themed earrings. Young kids love it, older kids love to prove how over it they are by pretending to hate it. Unfortunately, some 40-odd year old men are still stuck in that 12 year old phase of being embarrassed by the concept of having fun and giving a shit about things.
TerribleAttitude
Kids LOVE that stuff. Anything to get kids more excited about learning is great. And the fact she goes the extra mile to make these outfits HERSELF just goes to show how passionate she is about her job. Teachers like this are gems and their students appreciate it. Even if you dont like the 'look,' it's sad you don't see her passion and fall more for her because of it. She should be with someone who does. YTA
DrCarabou

Even though her students and their parents love the way she dresses, OP dislikes the “amount of attention she gets” and wishes that she would come home and get changed straight after work if she’s planning on doing anything else that day.

If she wants to wear that childish stuff to school, then whatever, but she should have more dignity in public.
TASorrynotsorry
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I don’t think she’s mine, but no I don’t like the way guys stare at her. I obviously don’t take her opinion into consideration since she dresses so ridiculously.
TASorrynotsorry

This is something they’ve talked about before, and OP’s girlfriend has told him that while he doesn’t have to like her clothes, he has to accept that he can’t tell her what to wear. OP doesn’t accept this, however, and so when his girlfriend went out to run errands with his mother the other day, he was upset that she hadn’t changed out of her Ms. Frizzle dress first. Where OP went wrong is that rather than expressing this to her like an adult or keeping his irrelevant feelings on her clothes to himself, OP decided to lie to her instead.

I was upset she went out like that with my mother, and told her that my mom said she was embarrassed and to ask that she please not dress like that again if they’re going out.

Whatever outcome OP was expecting, it wasn’t his girlfriend ringing up his mother to apologize, but sadly for OP, that’s exactly what she did. Unlike OP, his mother apparently has no problems with the way his girlfriend dresses and didn’t feel inclined to lie to her on his behalf. Not only did his mother tell his girlfriend the truth, she then called him up to yell at him “for lying to my girlfriend and trying to throw her under the bus because I was being an insecure jerk.”

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think my girlfriend should take what I think about her clothes into consideration and I’m not sorry for expecting her dress more appropriately in public
boudicas_shield
I bet Mom is hoping that she gets the girlfriend in the split.
boudicas_shield
AND USED HIS OWN MOTHER AS A PAWN IN HIS LIES
boudicas_shield

Instead of realizing at this point that he’d been a huge jerk and his only recourse was to apologize, OP doubled down. He went on to have a “huge fight” with his girlfriend in which he told her she should be embarrassed to be seen in public like that, and she told him that “the only thing she was embarrassed by was me.”

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Life pro tip: when your mother, friend, girlfriend and hundreds of strangers on the internet are all unequivocally saying you're wrong, chances are, you ARE.
DryEquivalent9
She's considered them, and she's rejected them because: you have zero evidence to back up your claims that her outfits are embarrassing to anyone besides you, you can't even articulate why you have such a problem with her wardrobe that doesn't make you sound like a controlling killjoy, and like she said, they're her clothes, and they make her happy, so she gets final say regardless of what you or anyone else thinks anyway. Seriously, dude, if the preponderance of responses convince you of nothing else, you should at least realize by now that this is your problem to deal with and you need to stop taking it out on her. If you still somehow think she's the one who needs to change, you need a new girlfriend. (Or a new gimmick, if you're doubling down for maximum troll points.)
mm172
You're wrong because she's not your Barbie doll. The clothes are not on your body, therefore they do not affect you in the least. Your acting like an uptight a****** who views his partner as his property. If you want to control what somebody is wearing, go to Target and buy a doll and you can dress it however you want to your heart's content. I feel terrible for your girlfriend, who is hopefully preparing to dump you. And I bet your mother is horribly embarrassed to realise how you turned out. YTA
kindlefan12

Despite his girlfriend refusing to speak or “do anything for me” since their fight, his mother’s disapproval, and his best friend calling him “trash,” OP still doesn’t really see that he did anything wrong. While he acknowledges that he shouldn’t have lied to her, he apparently thinks she “should take what I think about her clothes into consideration and I’m not sorry for expecting her dress more appropriately in public.”

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So you're feelings about what shes wearing matters more than her feelings about what shes wearing? Well heres another feeling for you, the world doesnt revolve around your over inflated ego. Honestly the way your girlfriend dresses sounds delightful, she should be embarrassed to be seen with your boring, controlling ass. Do her a favor and tell her you are too plain and uninteresting to be with her.
LifeNorm
Also notice he´s pissed beause she´s not doing stuff for him anymore. Poor baby had to get of his arse and make his own dinner or something.
LifeNorm
“She hasn’t spoke for me or done anything for me since.” WHAT DO YOU THINK SHE SHOULD DO FOR YOU AFTER THAT?! You lied to her, disrespected her, and think that you’re entitled to tell her not to dress a certain way. Apparently you need to go back to school, since you’re acting like a child! YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA YTA!!
MoshingMadness

Like all the best AITA stories, there is a happy ending. Citing his being “controlling and narrow-minded,” OP’s girlfriend broke up with him.

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'UPDATE' screenshot of the post which says ' I’m sure you all will be pleased to know we broke up tonight. She said I’m to controlling and narrow minded so she broke up with me.'
@AITA_reddit

And Reddit is celebrating.

Life pro tip: when your mother, friend, girlfriend and hundreds of strangers on the internet are all unequivocally saying you're wrong, chances are, you ARE.
@AITA_reddit
YTA. I have no right to tell her how to dress. yup. My mom then yelled at me for lying to my girlfriend and trying to throw her under the bus because I was being an insecure jerk. yup. She said the only thing she was embarrassed by was me. good for her, honestly. I’m not sorry and that's why you got dumped.
disregardable
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Yup, she sounds wonderful and I really hope she can find someone who at least loves her passion if not her dress sense.
disregardable
YTA. I was a teacher. I WISH I'd done stuff like this. Your GF, who I hope has decided to dump you, is awesome. She's enjoying her job and her life. I hope she walks away and never looks back.
@crystallz2000
 
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