Hello fellow citizens of the internet! Andrew here. Welcome to today’s edition of web_crawlr.
Our top stories today are about: A woman revealing that her ex broke up with her over the mention of the viral “orange peel theory,” a Sephora customer saying she almost fought a 10-year-old while shopping, why conspiracy theorists are in a tizzy over the hospitalization of Secretary of Defense Lloyd Austin, and why Trump supporters are in damage control mode after the latest Jeffrey Epstein document release includes and accusation against him.
After that, our Senior Reporter Audra has a “That One Sound” column for you.
See you tomorrow!
— A.W.
⚡ Today’s top stories
🍊 VIRAL
‘My ex’s final straw’: Dating experts warn your relationship may fail if it doesn’t pass ‘orange peel’ theory
A woman revealed that her ex-boyfriend broke up with her over mention of the “orange peel theory,” adding to the dialogue on TikTok around the test that assesses the strength of your relationship.
💄 WTF
‘Why is Sephora turning into like a daycare?’: Customer says she almost fought a 10-year-old at Sephora
“I had so much beef with a 10-year-old at Sephora today,” a customer said in a viral video.
🔍 CONSPIRACY
Died in Ukraine? Sent to Gitmo? Mysterious hospitalization of Secretary of Defense sends conspiracy theorists into a tizzy
The hospitalization of Secretary of Defense Lloyd Austin, caused by complications from an elective surgery last month, has led to an explosion of conspiracy theories online.
🗳️ POLITICS
Latest Epstein document release includes accusation against Trump—after week of supporters bragging that he wasn’t named
Former President Donald Trump is named in the latest release of court documents related to deceased pedophile Jeffrey Epstein, spurring his supporters to go into damage control.
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🎵 That One Sound
By Audra Schroeder
Senior Reporter
A 20-year-old U.K. hit gets revived, thanks to ‘Saltburn’
In each edition of web_crawlr we have exclusive original content every day. “That One Sound” is a weekly column from senior internet culture writer Audra Schroeder that explores the origin of popular sounds heard on TikTok. It runs on Wednesdays. If you want to read columns like this before everyone else, subscribe to web_crawlr to get your daily scoop of internet culture delivered straight to your inbox.
🕸️ Crawling the web
Here is what else is happening across the ‘net.
🐕🦺 A fellow customer tried to verbally intimidate a woman grocery shopping in Target with her service dog.
💇 This hair stylist’s opinion about how much you should tip will surprise you.
🧢 A viral video has sparked discussion about proper etiquette. In the video, a woman claims that an older man “scolded” her for wearing a hat in the library.
🍽️ What’s the best way to leave your table at a restaurant to help out the staff? Servers are weighing in after one TikToker expressed her own opinion on the matter.
🥪 With the cost of everything seemingly going up theses days, it’s no surprise people reminisce for the days of the dollar menu or the $5 footlong.
💸 A group of women at a birthday dinner attempted to convince the only man seated at the table to cover the costs of their meals after he asked for separate checks. The bill was $700.
💒 While weddings are supposed to be joyous occasions, they can also be stressful for both the couple and the guests. One of the major sources of that stress for the guests is the common dilemma—how much should you spend on the wedding gift?
👮 From the Daily Dot archive: A background check company is secretly paying cops on TikTok to push its services.
📝 Question of the Day
Everyone’s got opinions, and we want to know yours. Just click a button below to answer the question, and tomorrow we will let you know how fellow web crawlers like you answered.
HAVE YOU SEEN VINCE McMAHON MEMES IN YOUR TIMELINE?
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👋 Before you go
A TikToker has some questions for Barilla after an unfortunate discovery put her pasta plans on hold.
“I just went to go make rigatoni,” Cameron Monette (@cameronmonette) explained to her followers last week, noting that the box she grabbed from her pantry doesn’t expire until March 2025.
But what she found had nothing to do with her pasta’s shelf life.
“Look, I put it in the pot, and I noticed one of them had this,” she said, pointing to a dark spot on the uncooked noodle. “And I was like what is that? So I scratch at it. That is a bug. And I look, and there’s more.”
All in all, Monette said she found bugs on 27 different noodles in the same previously unopened box of Barilla pasta.
“Well I’m not having rigatoni tonight,” she wrote.
🎶 Now Playing: “Destroy Everything You Touch” by Ladytron 🎶
