‘Listen to the red flags’: Woman says she accidentally went on a date with a ‘local stalker’

In a viral TikTok video, a woman shares her “worst date ever” where she went out with a man who ended up being a “local stalker.” User Paige Hardy (@deconstruct_with_paige) claims the alleged date occurred when she was a junior in college. She met the guy on the first day of her ethics class, she says, and agreed to go out with him. 

Hardy says the first red flag happened when he invited her over to his place to cook dinner. When she politely declined, claiming she would feel more comfortable meeting in a public place, the man allegedly got furious. 

@deconstruct_with_paige When I tell you all of the #redflags I ignored. #worstfirstdate #feminism ♬ original sound – Paige

“He says, ‘Do you think I’m some sort of creep or something? How dare you?’” Hardy shares. 

The TikToker says they end up going out for coffee where she learned that despite being a film major, he had no opinions whatsoever on movies. Eventually, the man allegedly asks her where she lives. Hardy names a large apartment complex near campus that held about 1,000 people. The man then allegedly asks, “Which apartment?” 

“I start freaking out so I lied to him,” Hardy says. 

The next day, Hardy says she was hanging out with some friends when he started spam texting her to hang out. Hardy claims she told him she was busy with friends which is when he allegedly called her a “bitch.” After berating her via text, he allegedly apologized and asked if he could make it up to her by taking her out to dinner. 

Hardy says she posted the text conversation on a local feminist Facebook page with only his first name. Apparently, Hardy was not the first woman who had been on the receiving end of this young man’s pursuits. She says the post quickly gained traction, with about 39 women commenting that they had either been stalked or had a weird experience with this man. 

“Turns out this dude slid into the Canvas DMs of every single person in that class who had a feminine sounding name,” Hardy says in a follow-up video. “And this was like a 300-person class.”

@deconstruct_with_paige Reply to @michellegregory05 part 2!!!! Sorry the details are important! #worstfirstdate ♬ original sound – Paige

The women purportedly begin claiming they often see the man around their apartment complexes all the time. One of them, Hardy claims, said the man even followed her home and harassed her when she went out with friends. 

“He was just trying to cast a wide net and see what would work,” Hardy says. 

She purportedly filed a claim with the Title IX office, which addresses sexual harassment and sexual violence on campuses. She says the office claimed they were familiar with the man and had put together classes and a plan for him since he allegedly had some “learning and mental disabilities.” 

“He did not stick to that plan so he did not learn anything,” Hardy says. “He harassed more women and he ended up getting kicked out of my university.”

Hardy’s video gained more than 266,000 views since being uploaded to TikTok on May 6. Hundreds of women were either upset on Hardy’s behalf or shared their own experiences with “creepy” men. 

“I feel like a man not understanding why a woman wants a first date in a public place is a pretty could red flag to just end it there,” a top comment read. 

“I went on a date with this guy and he said he “didn’t really listen to music,” another wrote.  

“I feel like every woman experiences this,” a third commented. 

Hardy says from that point forward, she used a list of screening questions on men to figure out if they were creepy before going on a date with them. She says she stuck to her rules when she met a random man three years ago, and now they are getting married in October. 

“You’re allowed to have boundaries,” she says. “Listen to the red flags.”

The Daily Dot has reached out to the creator via TikTok comment for this story. 

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