Internet Culture

Is Lorde’s secret onion ring Instagram page back?

Of course, we still don’t know for sure that it’s Lorde running the page.

Photo of Siobhan Ball

Siobhan Ball

Two pale onion rings laid on crinkled white paper

Fans of the singer Lorde may remember back in 2017 when she was accused of running a secret Instagram page dedicated to reviewing onion rings.

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A photograph of thick reddish-brown breaded onion rings with the caption 'Gowings Bar & Grill at the QT Hotel, Sydney. This was a breaded red onion ring. Bit of a heavy, dry mouth feel. 2/5. 186w'
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Though Lorde never actually admitted to running the page, all signs pointed to the singer as the anonymous source behind it—and the shutting down of the account soon after its discovery all but confirmed it for most readers.

picture of a large pale onion ring on a white plate with the caption '
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That was it for the next two and a half years, until, on Dec. 20, the Instagram was back. Kicking things off with a brand new post captioned “Don’t call it a crumb back.”

Picture of two pale onion rings against white paper with the caption 'Don’t call it a crumb back...'
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A later post made the same day gave further information on her crunchy, beer-battered comeback. Accompanying a picture of some fish and chip shop spoils, Probably Lorde said:

I’ve got to be honest with you, this reviewer stopped ordering onion rings after her identity was leaked to the press in the great debacle of 2017. I’d get a smile and a wink from waitstaff— it got embarrassing, you know? But it occurred to me that some things are too good to let the internet spoil. Which brings us to the Crusty Crab fish and chip shop in beautiful Russell. Really good ring, sort of a reconstituted onion pulp situation but it conjured a Proustian nostalgia for days past. 

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Picture of fish and chips with a hand holding part of an onion ring that's been dipped in ketchup in front of it with the caption 'I’ve got to be honest with you, this reviewer stopped ordering onion rings after her identity was leaked to the press in the great debacle of 2017. I’d get a smile and a wink from waitstaff— it got embarrassing, you know? But it occurred to me that some things are too good to let the internet spoil. Which brings us to the Crusty Crab fish and chip shop in beautiful Russell. Really good ring, sort of a reconstituted onion pulp situation but it conjured a Proustian nostalgia for days past. 3.5/5.'
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It seems that, like a lot of us, the hellscape of 2020 has made Probably Lorde re-evaluate her priorities—and having fun with delicious onion rings definitely won out over caring what people think. She rounded off her day of spree posting with one more onion ring review, this time while still at the John Dory Takeaway, according to the location she tagged on the post.

Picture of a crumbed onion ring held between forefinger and thumb in front of several pieces of battered fish and a wedge of lemon captioned with 'Ah, the fish and chip shop ring. Humble, honest. Did I miss the crunch of a true battered ring biting into this? Perhaps. But it was perfectly seasoned, and brought joy. 3.8/5.'
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Of course, we still have no official confirmation that it is actually Lorde running the Instagram, but try telling the fans that.

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