Suffering through dad jokes are a rite of passage, one that many children find painful, awkward, and completely overrated.
But on Father’s Day, all bets are off. You gotta let dad get in a pun or two, no matter how cringe-worthy or insufferable they may be.
Dad jokes are not just something you can dive into cold turkey, however, so NPR has tweeted out a primer of the worst (or is it best?) puns, jokes, and overall bad-very-not-good punchlines.
Just look at this terrible, overdone plays on words.
We’ve heard Prague is cool, you may want to Czech it out.
— NPR (@NPR) June 18, 2017
The good.
We just watched a program about beavers.
— NPR (@NPR) June 18, 2017
It was the best dam program we’ve ever seen.
The bad.
Where do you learn to make ice cream.
— NPR (@NPR) June 18, 2017
Sundae school.
The obviously ugly.
Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself?
— NPR (@NPR) June 18, 2017
It was two tired.
This one was probably pretty hot with dads at the peak of the Twilight franchise.
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
— NPR (@NPR) June 18, 2017
Frostbite.
And perhaps the same could be said for this and Pirates of the Caribbean.
What’s a pirate’s favorite letter?
— NPR (@NPR) June 18, 2017
You think it’s ‘R,’ but it’s actually the ‘C.’
I am pained, just pained, by these awful jokes.
Why was the mushroom always invited to parties?
— NPR (@NPR) June 18, 2017
Because he was a fungi.
Did you hear about agreeable Caesar?
— NPR (@NPR) June 18, 2017
He came, he saw, he concurred.
The obviousness! My mind—it’s melting!
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
— NPR (@NPR) June 18, 2017
Because he was outstanding in his field.
We wouldn’t buy anything with Velcro.
— NPR (@NPR) June 18, 2017
It’s a total rip-off.
But of all of them, this dad joke shines the brightest.
When does a Dad joke become a Dad joke?
— NPR (@NPR) June 18, 2017
When it becomes apparent.
Trust us, folks, if Sasha and Malia Obama can get through their own dad’s pun-riddled turkey pardon, you, too, can get through this Father’s Day.
