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‘Taking the kids there before telling u is WILD’: Woman reveals the red flags she ignored before learning the real truth about her marriage

Photo of Ljeonida Mulabazi

Ljeonida Mulabazi

Person holding up a tiny Red Flag(l) Woman sharing her marriage story on TikTok(c) Wedding rings(r)

Sure, TikTok is packed with the latest trends, product reviews, and hot takes on world events. But it’s also a place where people share their personal stories, finding solace when life throws them for a loop.

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For example, most recently, TikTok user @fairandsquare_ opened up to her followers about a 15-year marriage with her soon-to-be ex-husband. 

The video quickly went viral, amassing over 1.6 million views as viewers connected with her vulnerability and the rollercoaster she’s going through.

How did it all begin?

Her story starts like many love stories do. “I met a boy 15 years ago,” she begins. 

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They were young, carefree, and fell into a life together that seemed picture-perfect on the outside. After a year of dating, he proposed, but she wasn’t ready for marriage yet. 

“I said no, thank you. But let’s keep dating,” she recounts. 

They moved to his home state, bought a house, and eventually got married after five years of building a life together.

Their relationship went through the usual stages. They worked together in the family business, and had three kids.

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But, as she explains, things started to change about a year ago, right before their tenth wedding anniversary. 

Why did things start going downhill after a decade of marriage?

“He starts checking out from the house, starts not doing his fair share,” she recalls. “Meanwhile, like he’s been a perfect husband throughout everything, a perfect father, like my best friend, everything, my confidant, the person who had my back through everything.”

When the disconnect persisted, she confronted him. He responded by saying he needed a break, a “reset,” so he decided to take a 12-day Ayahuasca retreat in Peru.  

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But when he returned, @fairandsquare_  says not much changed in their marriage afterward. 

“He comes home, and nothing changed,” she recalls. And when she continued trying to support him, he grew more distant and resentful. 

Then came a new friendship @fairandsquare_ was suspicious about, absences with no explanations, and a steady decline in communication. 

Finally, they separated in August, though he continued living at the house and hinting at something he needed to tell her. 

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One night, he finally opened up. 

“And so then he comes to me after a night out… and he continues to tell me that he’s gay… he has a three-bedroom townhome with this guy, the one I’ve been asking about,” she explains. “He’s taken the kids there, they got to tour it and pick out their beds and where they’re gonna sleep and everything.”

Surprised at the news, she asked for some clarification, and he allegedly responded saying “he’s known this whole time.” 

The woman shares more details

In a video update, @fairandsquare_ provided more details to her story. 

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She started by sharing that she holds no resentment toward her ex-husband, with whom she had nine years of a happy marriage.

“The thing that I’m frustrated with is he allowed me to move to a state where I have no family around,” she said. “Just knowing what he knew.”

She also clarified that she doesn’t feel the need to punish him but instead feels directionless and lost upon learning the truth. The couple is going through a mostly amicable divorce, she said.

@fairandsquare_ A not so fun story #divorce #liar #coparenting ♬ original sound – Fair&Square
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Viewers support @fairandsquare_

In the comments, users expressed their support for the TikToker and offered some advice.

“Knowing the whole time and still stringing you along is so evil,” wrote another. 

“File for divorce, take him for as much as you can get and move back where your family lives,” offered a third.

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The Daily Dot has reached out to @fairandsquare_via TikTok comments and messages for comment. 

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