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‘Some people’s intentions on app ain’t always pure’: Woman says she was tricked into going on actual date with another woman after meeting on Bumble BFF

‘Be careful.’

Photo of Jack Alban

Jack Alban

Woman says she was tricked into going on actual date with another woman after meeting on Bumble BFF

A woman shared her story about how she met a woman on Bumble BFF, a place to meet friends, and accidentally went on a romantic date with her.

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“I went on a Bumble BFF date, and it turned out to be an actual date,” NYC-based TikToker Michelle (@michellespublicdiary) said at the beginning of a viral video that’s garnered over 1.1 million as she talked into a microphone while laying down in bed.

She started her story by saying that the woman was “sweet” and ended up being exactly who she said she was, but once they met up at a Midtown restaurant, her behavior led Michelle to believe she was perhaps using the BFF option as a means of dating.

The first alarm bell that went off, Michelle said, happened when they were ordering food. Michelle said she’s used to ordering and paying for her own meal when going out with friends. She said the woman asked Michelle if she wanted to share plates of food instead.

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“I agreed, obviously, just ’cause, like, I didn’t know her, and I was like, ‘It’s fine.’ Like, I can try something new,” she said. While she thought it was strange, it was the BFF date’s reveal she was “bi” that really cued her into the fact this person was pursuing her romantically. “We didn’t really have a conversation leading up to her telling me this, but I guess I appreciate the information,” she said.

Then, it came time to fork over the cash for the bill.

“Obviously, I put down my card, and she put down her card. … My assumption was that we were gonna split the bill ’cause, you know, we split everything we ate,” she said. “And she slid my card back to me, and she was like, ‘No, of course I’m not gonna make you pay. And I was like, ‘What’re you talking about?’ ‘Cause like when me and my friends go to eat, you pay for what you eat, and considering that we split everything. I was like, ‘No we’re splitting the bill.’ She kept fighting me on it until I agreed, and I was like, ‘OK, fine. The next time we get food, like, I’ll pay for it.’”

@michellespublicdiary #datingstorytime #wlwdating #datingtipsforwomen #datingtips101 #relationshipadvice #relationshiptips #nycdating #nycdatingstories #datingwomen #nycvlog #foryou ♬ original sound – michellespublicdiary
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Michelle said the woman was trying to kill a few hours before her ride could pick her up and asked for recommendations on anything that’s fun to do in the area. “Since both her and I didn’t really wanna go clubbing, I was just, like, ‘Honestly, like, most things are closed at this time. Like, if anything, do you wanna come back to my apartment? We have some amenities upstairs. We can chill at the lounge, watch movies. Like, there’s games and stuff we can do upstairs.’ I was, like, ‘We can do that if you want.’”

So, Michelle invited her over to her place, but not her apartment, just in the common area of her apartment building. On the subway ride to her place, Michelle said the woman tried to hold her hand, which she didn’t find strange because she holds hands with her pals “all the time anyways,” but since she wasn’t close with this woman, she said it did cause her to raise an eyebrow.

Back at her place, Michelle said the two women ended up chatting, and the conversation shifted to sex. She said the woman revealed to her that she “likes sleeping with girls more than guys.”

“And at this point, I’m just a little uncomfortable, and I was like, ‘OK, that’s cool,’ and you know, we’re like talking about it … just ’cause I’m a curious person. And I’m not even joking, five minutes later, she’s just like, ‘You know, my ride’s actually not gonna come. Do you mind if I spend the night?’ And, obviously, I was like, ‘No, girl. Sorry, I don’t know you that well. It’s not something I’m comfortable with.’ And she’s like, ‘No problem. It’s fine. I’ll just Uber myself home,’” Michelle recalled. “So when her Uber gets downstairs, she goes to, like, give me the biggest hug, to the point that body’s literally squished onto her body. And while she’s hugging me, I literally noticed … she’s sniffing my hair, and everyone knows if someone’s sniffing your hair, it means that they like you.”

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After the woman left, Michelle said she sent her a long text thanking her for spending time with her and telling her to not worry about the “sleepover thing,” because there is going to be so many more opportunities for them to spend time together. The TikToker said she found the bomb of affection out the gate to be “overwhelming” and that she didn’t know the woman was interested in her sexually until the woman flat out asked her when their “next date” was going to take place.

Michelle recalled responding to the woman, “‘I didn’t know it was a date like that. Like, I thought that this was as friends,’ and yeah, she was not the happiest about that.”

Bumble noted on its website that friendship mode (previously called Bumble BFF, now rebranded to Bumble for Friends) “is for finding platonic relationships only,” and urges folks to use Bizz and Date modes on the application in order to pursue potential romantic connections.

Commenters who responded to Michelle’s video wrote that, they, too, haven’t had the best experiences with Bumble BFF. “I matched with a girl on Bumble BFF and she then sent me a long paragraph saying her and her bf were looking for a 3rd,” one said.

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But there were some who seemed to think the mistake could’ve easily been a harmless one. “She probably has a regular bumble and a bff account and forgot she met you on the bff side,” another individual wrote.

Another acknowledged that while they had success finding a best friend through the application, they know there are folks out there who might try to “game” the system. “I met my bestie on bumble bff. Just be careful cause some people’s intentions on app ain’t always pure,” they shared.

The Daily Dot has reached out to Michelle via TikTok comment and Bumble via email for further information.

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