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‘Never catch me being humble again’: HR worker shares 3 things you should never do in the workplace

‘I learned the hard way.’

Photo of Braden Bjella

Braden Bjella

HR worker speaking with caption 'THINGS I WILL NEVER DO AFTER BEING IN HR FOR 10 YEARS' '1.BEING TOO PERSONAL' 'sharing too much does not do you any good at any point in your career' (l) HR worker speaking with caption 'THINGS I WILL NEVER DO AFTER BEING IN HR FOR 10 YEARS' '2.BE HUMBLE' 'never catch me being humble again' (c) HR worker speaking with caption 'THINGS I WILL NEVER DO AFTER BEING IN HR FOR 10 YEARS' '3.STICK AROUND TOO LONG AT COMPANY EVENTS' 'holiday parties for longer than an hour and 1/2' (r)

Navigating a workplace can be exhausting. On top of taking care of one’s responsibilities, workers are also tasked with managing personal relationships, dealing with office politics, and a whole lot more.

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Now, after almost a decade working in human resources, TikTok user Valerie (@lavishvaal) has some advice for current employees about handling this often tumultuous environment.

In a video with over 2.2 million views as of Sunday, Valerie goes into detail about three things she says she’d “never do” at work given her experience in HR— “some of which I wish I knew sooner,” she adds in the caption.

@lavishvaal Some of which I wish I knew sooner 🥲 #hradvice #thingsyoudidntknow #neveragain #hr #careeradvice #fyp ♬ original sound – Valerie J.
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First, Valerie advises against being too personal with your co-workers and higher-ups.

“Sharing too much does not do you any good at any point in your career,” she says. “Especially when you know that you’re trying to move up, you’re trying to establish yourself as a reputable person within a company, do not overshare. It will only come back to haunt you.”

Next, Valerie tells workers not to be humble.

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“I used to think being humble was going to get me far, people would appreciate me and say, ‘oh, she’s nice,’ and no,” she details. “So many successful women I work with are far from humble and will literally make sure that they enter a room and their presence is felt. Never catch me being humble again.”

Finally, Valerie claims that workers should only stay at company events like happy hours and parties for a short amount of time.

“The truth is, people start drinking, stuff starts happening, and I do not want to be associated,” she explains. 

In the comments, several users spoke about the veracity of Valerie’s statements.

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“I’m in HR and I tell my non-HR friends this aaaaall the time,” a user claimed.

“I learned the hard way,” detailed another. “She is 100% correct.”

However, some users disagreed. 

“This might all be true but I cannot spend 8 hours everyday acting like a robot and showing none of my real personality,” stated a commenter.

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“I’ll stay humble because I do not care about the corporate ladder and need to have fun,” a second wrote.

“This was all true until I started working for a company that valued people & wanted them to be authentic as possible to avoid toxicity at work,” recalled a third.

Overall, TikTokers were upset that these considerations had to be made at all.

As one user summarized it, “Why corporate is so exhausting.”

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We’ve reached out to Valerie via Instagram direct message.

Update 2:11pm CT January 26: In an Instagram DM exchange with Daily Dot, Valerie says that she is speaking from experience.

“All I learned comes from a mix of my personal experiences and cases I’ve managed,” she details.

She also clarified the “don’t be humble” point. “‘Don’t be humble’ doesn’t mean having no sense of morals, empathy, or thinking you’re better than anyone by any means,” she writes. “It just means that rather than making yourself small, or seeing yourself as less than, you are confident and allow yourself to be seen/voice to be heard. I think commenters thought I meant one should be arrogant but absolutely not.”

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